Back in the Dating Game :)

Josh and I love going out together. We find so much joy in spending time with each other and exploring new places and trying new things. We are in no way shape or form "home-bodies". Needless to say, this has been hard on our checkbook. :) Once we realized this we decided to start a weekly night specifically designated for going out. Our "date night" as it is neatly scribbled onto our calender. :) The plan was that we would stay in (or go hijack my parent's BBQ & pool ;) !!) the other 6 nights of the week, and date nights would be designated for eating out, movies, meeting up with friends in cities we don't frequent...etc.

We are on week two of this new date night thing and I am totally looking forward to week three. I have to say it is SO much better than I even expected it to be! Sure, I have been on many "dates" with my husband, but planning on our dates in advance have made it that much more fun. I feel like I am actually "dating" my husband again. It has made it so much more special. I love getting dressed up knowing that I am going out on a date NOT just going to dinner with my husband.

This has been such a fun thing in our marriage. I totally see the significance in dating your spouse. I feel so loved and filled up at the end of the night. This may have started as a solution to spending so much money but it has ended up being so much more than that. Something that I treasure very much. It is something I hope to continue for the rest of our lives, however it changes our evolves. I hope it is always something that remains. I urge my married friends to date your spouse...it will do wonders for your marriage--I promise! If you need a sitter--call me :)

I just thought I would share this little update in our family :)
We are totally back in the dating game and LOVING IT!

XOXO
Em

 Our First two Date Night Photos...

Decades  more to come :)

Give me Faith

Lately the word faith has been stirring in my mind.

There was a time in our life, soon after we got married that we just really didn't see a need for God. We stopped spending time with him. We slowly started to pull out of the ministries we were serving in. The weeks that we would actually show up at church were few and far between. Sunday mornings were our mornings to sleep in and lounge around the house. It's not that we were rejecting our faith. We just became lazy and the absence of Jesus in our lives was slowly pulling us further and further away from each other.

Very soon after we found out I was pregnant something stirred up inside of both of us. We started to notice the gaping hole in our life and our marriage. We wanted a change but didn't know where to start. Josh suggested that we make a New Years Resolution to pray together every day. Let me tell you--this is the best decision that we have made thus far in our marriage. If you are not praying with your spouse regularly, do it. Seriously...it works wonders. I have never felt closer to my husband.

It is crazy how when you start to really pursue the Lord he speaks to you so clearly. In mid-February, on a trip home from Big Bear, Josh told me that he felt that God was telling him that we needed to get back involved being High School Leaders.  He didn't want to tell me because he didn't think I would want to get involved. I told him that I had actually been hearing the same thing from God but I didn't want to tell him because I didn't want to get involved. :) God had bigger plans. Everything ended up falling into place and we both feel that we are serving exactly where God wants us. Around this time our church was going through a series called "Fully Devoted" talking about being a fully devoted follower of Christ and everything that comes along with that. Amazing series, by the way. We both felt it on our hearts to start tithing. Soon after that, it was reading our bibles and journaling. Then--witnessing. It felt like every Sunday our pastor was talking directly to us. God was saying "Okay--you want to really experience me?? This is what you need to do next." We were so excited venture into every next step of this adventure of experiencing God.

After we started to really obey God it felt like life kept throwing rocks at us. And I don't mean little stones. I am talking big-fat-freakin-rocks. We really couldn't catch a break. We both became so discouraged. We felt frustrated and angry. Why was this happening? We were doing everything we were supposed to be doing! Why wasn't God rewarding us for that??

Then it hit us like a ton of bricks.
He doesn't owe us anything. But we owe him everything.

Every person that we would talk to about our struggles would tell us "Have faith. God will take care of you." Every verse I would read would talk about having faith even in your pain. Every worship song that would speak of faith would bring me to tears. But it was so hard to trust. It was so hard to not take back control over our lives. I wanted to walk on water. I didn't want to look down. We both wanted to keep our eyes on Jesus and trust completely. But it was scary. 

This brings us to the now.

This week, we got hit with a really big rock. We both wanted to just give up. Almost immediately after we were knocked off of our feet I heard a song that I am sure that I have heard before but it took on such a bigger meaning.

The very first few lines shook me in a major way:

I need You to soften my heart, To break me apart.  
I need You to open my eyes, To see that You're shaping my life.

 You can listen to it here :)

This became our prayer.

"Give me faith to trust what you say...I'm broken inside, I give you my life"
"My flesh may fail, but my God you never will"

I can't tell you the times I have repeated this in my head over and over.
I can't tell you how many times I have had to give it to God.
This song has played on repeat in our house all week.

We are so thirsty for that faith. To walk on water.
We long for trust without boarders, as Hillsong United so gracefully puts it in their song, Oceans.
(another good song that can be frequently found on loop in our home :)

I wish I could say that our new journey of not only pursuing God, but also pursuing real faith and trust has led us to an easy, painless, and care-free life. No. It's freaking scary. But it's so worth it. We wont stop living for Christ just because things get hard. We will keep going and we will continue to lean on each other daily.

As hard as these last few months have been, it has been amazing to be able to experience God in a very real way. It has been rewarding to re-discover the simple things about Jesus. It has been inspiring experiencing a true, Christ-centered marriage. And it has been humbling to be knocked off of our feet and to realize He doesn't owe us anything. But we owe him everything. There will always be rough patches in life. I think what God has really been showing me is that we need to fight for him in every season. Not just when things are easy. I want to live a life passionately pursing Christ, no matter what!

1 Timothy 6:12
Fight the good fight for the true faith. Hold tightly to the eternal life to which God has called you, which you have confessed so well before many witnesses.

Thank you for letting me share whats been on my heart.
I really hope that this is some-what encouraging, and we would really appreciate your prayers!
Let's bare each other's burdens. Let me know how I can pray for you :)

xoxo
Em :)

Choosing Joy

I am really bad at blogging. I have TONS of time to do it but I never get around to it. I really want to change that. So let this be the start of a new era of blogging for Emily! You can all keep me accountable.
I can do it...I know I can!

Now, let me be the first to introduce you to my sweet girl, Isla Christine!

I am 5 1/2 months into my pregnancy and she is already the center of mine and Josh's world.
We love her so much.
We are totally "those parents"
We think she is SO cute already. The littlest kick melts my heart. Josh loves to sing to my stomach, and talk to her. (He is the only one I really don't mind doing this...they warned me it would be weird when people touched your growing tummy, but I can't help but think it is more strange for people to talk to it. How come no one warned me about this?? haha) But when my husband talks to our little monkey-girl and she responds with her little kicks, it makes my week. We can't wait to meet her.

One of the best decisions we have made as parents so far (in my opinion) is that we have made a conscious effort to STAY POSITIVE. The minute you announce you are expecting everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, wants to give you their two cents. We knew it was coming. And we chose to take what people say with a grain of salt. It is silly to me how many people try to scare a pregnant woman, really?! It's actually mean! I can't tell you how many times I've been told:
"You are going to be sick your ENTIRE pregnancy" (I'm actually feeling great these days!)
or "Say goodbye to your social life"
or "You are going to give birth and no matter how much you read you WON'T understand your baby"
or "Enjoy your life now because you are going be miserable after the baby is born"

Seriously...these are just some of the ridiculous things that people have said to me...and I'm not even going to get started on all the non-solicited advice I get daily!

The bottom line is that we know our life is going to change. We know things will not stay the same. We know there are going to be tough moments when all we can really do is rely on God and each other. We know we are probably going to get frustrated and shed some tears. But we also know that we are going to CHOOSE JOY.

There will always be hard seasons in life. But does that mean that they are not the most rewarding? I do not want to complain about being a mom but rather take it on to the best of my ability and rely on Jesus to mold me into the mama that Isla is going to need.

I am going into this new chapter realistically. I only have an idea of what is coming. I do know at times it is going to be really hard. But I also know that joy is a choice. I believe with my whole heart that nothing that is of value on this earth is easy.
I know there will be moments of tears and moments of laughter.
I know there will be moments of insecurity and moments of confidence.
I know there will be moments of frustration and moments of pure beauty.
I can't wait for EVERY moment. Even the tough ones.
I can't wait for her giggles.
I can't wait to feel her baby skin.
I can't wait to get to look into her eyes.
I can't wait to watch my husband love our baby girl.

I can't wait to be her mama.

And I am not going to let anyone take that joy and excitement away!

So, I challenge you to go live out your day to the fullest. Exude positivity...
and CHOOSE JOY.

"Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Jesus Christ."
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

xoxo,
      Em

 Easter 2013 at CCV

Learning to Love

One year...
A year of struggling to make bills.
A year of laughing, crying, eating...
A year of TV nights on the couch.
A year of learning to live together.
A year of LOVING living together.
A year of figuring out how to balance life.
A year of traveling.
A year of wine.
A year of hiking, eating, movie watching...etc.

A year of being married to my best friend!

I looked forward to our one year mark everyday. Everyone says the first year is the hardest. I thought in the hard times if we could just make it to that one year mark everything would be okay! Once we make it to June 11, 2012 everything will be easier!

Well, June 11, 2012 rolled around and we went to Laguna for a romantic weekend for our anniversary and....FOUGHT! I was so confused! It was our anniversary. We were away from home. It had been a YEAR! And I was grumpy.

It was a frustrating night for my poor husband; trying to please me, love me, make me happy. Not really knowing why I was sad. I was just in one of those moods, and I was confused! It was a hard night and it wasn't until the drive home the next day that I had realized what a brat I had been. (I hate it when that happens! WHY can't we have these self realizations in the moment!) I did a lot of praying and a lot of thinking and I thought to myself for the first time: Why is it that things are supposedly easier after the first year?

Well, after pondering this for a while I decided it's not really the year that makes the difference but you have to come to a point where you stop thinking about yourself. From the very moment the man of your dreams gets down on his knee the world (in any normal girls mind) revolves around YOU. Your wedding. Your fiance. Your tablecloths. Your wedding gown. Your flowers. Your new place. Your plans. You, you, you....and YOU! I don't think there is another time in a girls life where you talk about yourself more. Being engaged is all about YOU. Then the wedding comes around and you talk about your wedding, and post pictures of your wedding. Answer questions about your wedding. Decorate YOUR new place. It just continues. Not to mention living with someone else and you are both trying to mesh YOUR way of doing Ithings. Your way of washing dishes. Your way of making the bed. Your way of cooking eggs. Your way of doing Saturday mornings.

It really is exhausting!

I think, at least for Josh and I, things start to just come to a head. You get tired of you. You can only focus on "yourself" for so long and finally realize it is time to focus on your marriage.

Maybe I'm just a slow learner, and maybe I'm about to embarrass myself all over the Internet...(oh well, it wouldn't be the first time!) But it has taken me a year to realize that it is time to stop waiting for things to get better. It's time to stop focusing on Emily and start focusing on my marriage. I can't win. Josh can't win. Our marriage has to win. I have to start acting. Change cannot come without action. I thought that maybe it just took a year to get used to each other. But the thing is I think it takes a year for most people to realize its not all about you!

I have an amazing marriage and the most fabulous husband. I could go on and on for days about him. I am so blessed. Don't read this blog and think we are unhappy, because that is not the case. It's just been a learning process!

Things I love about my marriage:
The laughter. (This has gotten us through many tough times)
Our Mondays. (Which normally consist of small group and The Bachelorette :)
Cooking together.
Cuddling.
My husbands heart. (I have never met a man more willing to serve his wife)
Wearing Josh's clothes to bed. (My favorite thing to do when he is gone on his 24's)

I could go on and on....

Moral of the story, being selfish sucks. And its exhausting! I'm done!

Thanks for letting me rant :)

Em


Josh and I on our one year anniversary :)

hmmmmm...

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." - E.M. Forster.

Watching my Prince Swim through Shark Infested Waters

"Men are simple - not simpletons - but simple in their needs ... They need appreciation, approval and affection from their woman; and when they get that, they will swim through shark-infested waters to bring us lemonade."    Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Every time I hear this quote I can't help but to think of my amazing husband. 

Just tonight...We are laying on the couch watching "How I Met Your Mother"
He is in his pajamas...comfortable, relaxed, content.
I mention that I have been craving hot wings for a couple days
and he gets up puts on his shoes and brings me Wing Stop.

How did I get him? Honestly??

The thing is this is a normal occurrence for Josh. 

He is ALWAYS there to fulfill my every need...

not because I make him or ask him to, but because he genuinely WANTS to!

The fact that Josh would be more than willing to swim through shark infested waters for me is no secret.

Anyone who has been around us for more than 10 minutes can tell you that.

But it just made me wonder...

Do I give him the appreciation, approval and affection that he needs??

Sadly, the answer is probably...No.

Not on the level that he needs or deserves at least.

How did it happen that I found this prince that will swim through the waters even when I fail to meet those needs on a regular or consistent basis?

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband and try my hardest to meet his needs

but more often then not I find myself thinking about how
undeservingly blessed I am.

In the end...

Watching him lead our marriage and swim through those Shark Infested Waters 

only makes me want to do the same for him.

So I guess that you can say Josh is helping me to be a better person and a better wife!

I am so lucky. So blessed. So in love with my prince.

45 Days

45 days ago I got to spend the entire day with 8 of my best friends.
45 days ago I wore my favorite dress.
45 days ago I was the most popular girl at the party.
45 days ago I kissed the most popular guy at the party.
45 days ago I was STARVING.
45 days ago I didn't care.
45 days ago I laughed with people I loved.
45 days ago I danced with my dad.
45 days ago I got butterflies.
45 days ago I watched my brothers cry.
45 days ago I made my mom proud.
45 days ago I walked the most important walk of my life.
45 days ago I made a promise.
45 days ago I made a vow.
45 days ago I married my best friend.

45 days ago my whole life changed for the better! This blog is for me to document the days ahead in this beautiful new life! (but mostly, it's to kill time until Prince Charming lets me make pretty babies!)  So come on, follow me and I will follow you!! :)